Falling lights are fading... (updated)

Apparently, Dr. Suess wrote The Cat in the Hat using around 240 first grade level words. Tonight I'll be working on doing the same, only about the post-apocalypse.

I know it's a bad idea, but that's why I'm going to do it.

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Here's what I scribbled down before I passed out.

The Night Is Not Nice

My name is Alex. I have a big brother who is named Sam.
We were in our house, the night the animals came.
It was right after that rain quit and the air went bad.
And for a week we hadn't seen our mom or dad.
The animals knocked on our door, and said they were going to have some fun with us.
My brother said "No!"
The animals kicked the door.
Again and again, they kicked the door.
And soon it came down.
My brother said to me, "You go that way, and I'll go this way.
Go to the school. 'I can always help,' that's what Teacher used to say."
I ran and ran and ran, and made it to the school.
But the animals saw me and came to school, too.
I went to Teacher's room. She had a boy and a girl with her.
Teacher saw me, and said, "Who are you?"
"I am Sam's little brother," I said.
"Come in, come in," she said as she pulled me in.
"But we need to go, the animals are coming."

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Obviously it'd be nice to have more descriptive words. I'm working with only about 150, whereas Suess had about 500 to work with. I went with the first decent word last I could find, and so I know I'm missing some necessary words (there's no "I" or "a" or "too," which, as sight words, count). I'll raid a few books for words and see what I can get put together.

Think of the Children

by Jason Chan


Once again we are reminded of the difference that Zombie education at an early age can have. Imagine if these children were not drilled in standard Zombie defense tactics. Now, granted, a playground isn't the best place for a last stand, but notice the things they got right. First off, they have the high ground, granting them easy access to the Zombie's vital spot - the head. Secondly, their positioning allows them to dispatch the most amount of Zombies while limiting their exposure to attack. The slide is an ideal place to fend of the undead, as every one hit falls down, pushing the ones behind it down as it falls. The bridge area is being defended as best as possible, with the boy holding back his fallen classmates while the girl in pink brings death from above. I know a lot of parents are worried about damaging their kids' development by explaining to them the reality about the undead at an early age, but just imagine if the kids seen above hadn't been properly educated. Their first exposure to the truth could very well mean exposure to the virus.

We here at Night of the Living Ryan hope these brave souls managed to hold off the swarm of undead friends and classmates until they could be rescued, or at least managed to escape before the recently revived parents and teachers showed up looking for a meal. We'd also like to remind our loyal readers that it's never the early to start teaching your kids about the dangers of a Zombie outbreak. And, please, make sure you go over your household's survival plans at least once a month. Remember, only you can prevent having to put a bullet in a loved one's head in order to protect the uninfected members of your family.